Simple facts of life
                                    ++++++++++++++++++++


    o OFFICE ARITHMETIC
      Smart boss + smart employee = profit
      Smart boss + dumb employee  = production
      Dumb boss  + smart employee = promotion
      Dumb boss  + dumb employee  = overtime
 
    O SHOPPING MATH
      A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
      A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.
 
    O GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
      A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
      A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
      A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
      A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
 
    O HAPPINESS
      To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
      To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
 
    O LONGEVITY
      Married men live longer than single men do,
      but married men are a lot more willing to die.
 
    O PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
      A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
      A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
 
    O DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
      A woman has the last word in any argument.
      Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
    
    O HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
      Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs
      and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started
      doing the same thing to them at funerals.
 
 
 The most destructive habit..............................Worry
 The greatest Joy.......................................Giving
 The greatest loss........................Loss of self-respect
 
 The most satisfying work.......................Helping others
 The ugliest personality trait.....................Selfishness
 The most endangered species.................Dedicated leaders
 
 Our greatest natural resource.......................Our youth
 The greatest "shot in the arm"..................Encouragement
 The greatest problem to overcome.........................Fear
 
 The most effective sleeping pill................Peace of mind
 The most crippling failure disease....................Excuses
 The most powerful force in life..........................Love
 
 The most dangerous pariah..........................A gossiper
 The world's most incredible computer................The brain
 The worst thing to be without........................... Hope
 
 The deadliest weapon...............................The tongue
 The two most power-filled words......................."I Can"
 The greatest asset.....................................Faith   Honesty
 
 The most worthless emotion..........................Self-pity
 The most beautiful attire..............................SMILE!
 The most prized possession......................... Integrity
 
 The most powerful channel of communication.............Prayer Sincere Talk
 The most contagious spirit.........................Enthusiasm